Jennie Smash

You get a whole new view of the world when you date someone in the military. OK, it’s actually the same view, but you get additional proof that many people are dumbasses.

Por ejemplo: The other night, Sgt Lucky and I were having a few drinks, as we do, when a friend of a friend asked Sarge what he does. He heaved his usual sigh and said, “I’m in the military.”

“Oh,” the guy said. “Well, at least you don’t have PSD or you’re missing a limb or something.”

I couldn’t hear, because the speaker was right above my ear, so I got all of this later, when Sgt Lucky reported the incident as an example of how he’s really mellowing out in his old age.

“You would have been proud of me,” he said. “All I said was, ‘yeah, thank God for that, huh?’”

“PSD?” I said. “PSD? What the hell is that?”

“I do not know.”

“Oh, shit. I wish I’d heard.”

“Why? It was just really annoying.”

“I would have told him that you do, in fact, suffer from Pussy Sonar Detection, and that it’s a common ailment among men uniform.”

Today’s imaginary medical condition is brought to you by Saturday night, and people who honestly mean well.