I’ve Been Coasting on This for Years

Coworker Dennis: i hate christopher hitchens
Jennie Smash: me too
Jennie Smash: but why do you hate him today?
Jennie Smash: because he’s a self-hating homo?
Jennie Smash: because he gives drunks a bad name?
Jennie Smash: there are so many reasons
Coworker Dennis: because Slate is willing to publish an article all about why he doesn’t like someone
Jennie Smash: ok, looking at this
Coworker Dennis: if i wrote an article about how i don’t like my old boss, would someone publish it? prob not
Jennie Smash: i would, dennis
Jennie Smash: if it were up to me
Jennie Smash: i would publish ANYTHING you had to say
Coworker Dennis: haha, flattery will get you sexywhere!