Jennie Smash

Coworker Dennis: Ugh, I’m still at work. Tell me about your plans, so that I can live through you.

Me: Actually, I think I’m staying in.

Coworker Dennis: I don’t believe you.

Me: Believe! My friend Adrian just called and was all “come to this party and that party,” but I seriously feel like I need some B-12 and a nap.

Coworker Dennis: Be that as it may, I predict that by 10:00, you will be fully rested and ready to go to this party or that party.

Me: Or I’ll already be running down the street with my pants around my ankles while someone’s girlfriend chases me with a frying pan.

Coworker Dennis: As you are still frenching this poor girl’s boyfriend.

Me: Man, I wish real me was as cool as our version.

Coworker Dennis: Right?

Me: Also, bonus points for “frenching.”