Coworker Dennis: Ugh, I’m still at work. Tell me about your plans, so that I can live through you.
Me: Actually, I think I’m staying in.
Coworker Dennis: I don’t believe you.
Me: Believe! My friend Adrian just called and was all “come to this party and that party,” but I seriously feel like I need some B-12 and a nap.
Coworker Dennis: Be that as it may, I predict that by 10:00, you will be fully rested and ready to go to this party or that party.
Me: Or I’ll already be running down the street with my pants around my ankles while someone’s girlfriend chases me with a frying pan.
Coworker Dennis: As you are still frenching this poor girl’s boyfriend.
Me: Man, I wish real me was as cool as our version.
Coworker Dennis: Right?
Me: Also, bonus points for “frenching.”
Jennie Smash 
Oh yeah, you’ll be out this weekend. I have a carrot all ready to tease you with, Frenchie.
It makes me happy inside to think that one way I might be worthy of a post category the way Coworker Dennis is.