The comedian Emmett Furrow has no collar bones. I’m not really sure what you’d all do if I weren’t here to tell you these things — but fortunately, you don’t have to worry about it.
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Jennie Smash 
My life is much improved, having read this. Much like a Jehovah’s Witness tract. Not so much as a Jack Chick tract tho. Just sayin’.
–Taupey, the Culturally Facile Kangaroo
what is Taupey talking about there??
i’m glad you enlightened me with that.
Emmett looks creepy. I wonder if he knows that he looks creepy. Maybe people think I look creepy and just aren’t telling me. I better give everyone a call.
That is going on my Wall of WTF?
Interesting. I’ve seen many men without spines before, but never seen one without a collarbone.
And I’m sorry but what the bloody hell is a Jehova’s Witness tract?!
You want a comic with a collar bone?
I have a collar bone, I also have a spine…but um, no Jehovah’s Witness tract.
I did see a Jehovah witness trying to convert Irish guys at a pub in Astoria once though.
COUGH…
(I like you and stuff)
…COUGH
“what the bloody hell is a Jehova’s Witness tract?!”
A tract is one of the words that can describe the little pamphlets churches and politicians and doctor’s offices hand out to people.
Oh. Ok. Thanks.
Now that I know that reasonable answers are available, I have *so* many more questions for you, Taupey…
Yeah, I know I look creepy. Mostly because I have a mirror.
And it takes extra spine to go onstage and show people how freaky life can be without a collarbone. BTW, if you’ve found pics of me all folded up, rest assured I don’t always stay folded. I make it a point to keep my shoulders a respectable distance from each other during my off-the-clock hours. People in my day to day life are unaware of my mutation. It takes will power to pull that off, but it’s better than scaring the kids.