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Ma Smash: Are you at home? Me: Yes. Ma Smash: At your apartment? Me: Um, yes. Ma Smash: Oh, sorry. It was so quiet, I was confused. Me: ? Ma Smash: Every time I talk to you, there’s so much noise in the background. I figured you’d given up your apartment and moved into a…
Ma Smash: Are you at home?
Me: Yes.
Ma Smash: At your apartment?
Me: Um, yes.
Ma Smash: Oh, sorry. It was so quiet, I was confused.
Me: ?
Ma Smash: Every time I talk to you, there’s so much noise in the background. I figured you’d given up your apartment and moved into a bar.
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My mom (from Iowa, bless her Midwestern heart) is absolutely convinced that my cell phone can only be used whilst driving the car. She asks me, “Where are you?” every time I talk to her.
If I say, “At home, ma,” she accuses me of being a liar.
Jennie Smash 
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