Dennis Keeps up With the Kardashians So I Don’t Have to

Jennie Smash: DENNIS!

Coworker Dennis: JEN!

Coworker Dennis: How are you?

Jennie Smash: I’m swell! How are you?

Coworker Dennis: Devastated by the announcement of Kim Kardashian’s divorce.

Jennie Smash: OMG, how hilarious?

Jennie Smash: I laughed so hard.

Coworker Dennis: She dressed as sexy Poison Ivy out of sadness, I guess.

Jennie Smash: As should we all.

Jennie Smash: In mourning for their fake relationship.

Coworker Dennis: I really just don’t want to watch the Kardashians act out sadness.

Coworker Dennis: And say things like “we were growing apart” on camera.

Jennie Smash: I don’t want to watch them do anything.

Jennie Smash: But I hope they say that.

Jennie Smash: Because I love the idea of growing apart over 72 days.

Jennie Smash: Also, I love that Kris is now dragging Nicole Brown Simpson into all of this.

Coworker Dennis: Oh, I know.

Coworker Dennis: She regrets not saving her life — by going to lunch with her.

Coworker Dennis: I’m not sure that prevents people from stabbing other people to death.

Jennie Smash: Salad. Salad solves everything.

Coworker Dennis: And then your husband defends the [alleged] killer and you’re just irked?

Jennie Smash: So ANNOYING.

Jennie Smash: I really think that whole family is the worst bunch of people ever, from any given direction.

Coworker Dennis: They’re all really awful. I can’t believe they’re famous.

Jennie Smash: They were the first thing that made me believe the world was going to end in 2012.

Coworker Dennis: Keeping Up With Harold Camping. I would watch that show.

Kim Kardashian as Poison Ivy
"I'm the worst."

Image: http://lovekardashian.tumblr.com/

Published by Jen Hubley Luckwaldt

I'm a freelance writer and editor.

One thought on “Dennis Keeps up With the Kardashians So I Don’t Have to

  1. I wonder if the Women with salad pictures would be more horrifying if it ended with a picture of a woman in tears and/or laughing maniacally, or if it’s scarier that I can see the progression happening through the post anyway.

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