I don’t want to alarm anyone, but I feel I should mention that it is now getting darker at an earlier hour than ever before. This is not hyperbole, but actual fact, observed by me, and confirmed by all of my friends and coworkers who wish I would shut up and leave them alone.
I know it’s December and all, but I’m pretty sure that last year at this time, it did not start to get dark at 3:30 in the afternoon. I’m near a window at work, and I could easily have turned my lamp on at that hour today. This is not OK at all, and clearly means that the planet has become loosened from its orbit and is now winging off into the deepest, coldest reaches of space.
Upside? I can stop wearing 45 SPF sunblock. It’s important to be positive.