I just cleaned my apartment for the gayest* reason ever. I was watching Mommie Dearest on Oxygen, and when Joan Crawford is torturing her daughter Christina by throwing Ajax at her and insisting that she scrub the already clean floor, I actually thought: “Jeez, I wish she’d send Christina over to clean my floor.”
SCRUB, Christina! SCRUB!
* No, I’m not using “gay” as a pejorative. Cleaning because of Joan Crawford is gay, all right? It’s gay. And therefore, great.