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I don’t want you to think that it’s been a rough couple of days, but I just got an extra tampon from the machine in the girls’ room — two for a quarter, instead of the usual one — and I was all like, “Yay! Maybe things are finally looking up!” I’d like to think…
I don’t want you to think that it’s been a rough couple of days, but I just got an extra tampon from the machine in the girls’ room — two for a quarter, instead of the usual one — and I was all like, “Yay! Maybe things are finally looking up!”
I’d like to think that this means that I have a positive personality and can find joy in all things, but I’m afraid it really means that I’m a huge sucker.
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It would truly be a good day, if you took the extra…girl thingy and decided to make a walrus face with the two. Or maybe that’s just a guy thing.
Wait, Tim, you mean the extra TAMPON? Should I stick the extra TAMPON in my nose? TAMPON? Generally used for the MENSTRoooATING?
Stop it, STOP IT. I can feel my testosterone changing to estrogen. Man thoughts, man thoughts, beer, poker, dogs playing poker, scratching… I think I’m okay now.
Actually, Tim from MD is correct in his use of that phase. The technical name for that… um… you know… on “Mars” IS “…girly thingy” Not very precise for aliens, because it also applies to coherent non-linear thinking, general awareness of other-than-self, small pieces of underwear that real Martians do not wear, and any past-time that does not involve a ball.
I want to move to Boston, they charge us a really strange 35 cents here. Actually, there’s a game that Rob invented with his bro that’s called Pudgey Nostril that you can play with either tampooons or marshmellows, depending on how stretchy your nostrils are.
That. Is. Awesome.
Oh! Oh! I have a gross tampon story! See, this one time, I was sitting with my hubby and a bunch of his army buddies. This one guy was fishing around for gum in his wife’s purse, (which is a total violation of privacy, punishable by death), and he came across a tampon. He then proceeded to unwrap it and stick it in the full beer glass of a bathroom-bound pal. I was mortified, but my embarrassment quickly changed to amazement when I saw that it soaked up the entire beer! And it wasn’t even a super!
Jennie Smash 
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