Category Archives: the fast metabolism diet

I’m down four and a half pounds now. This is actual crazy talk. I’m in serious danger of starting a cult around this diet. If you see me in Union Square, wearing a sandwich board and ringing a bell, you’ll know what happened. (If you see me in Union Square with a sandwich, please makeContinue reading “Day 4 of the Fast Metabolism Diet: WTF?”

I have lost 2.2 pounds. For those of you who do not have thyroid problems, let me explain: this is a miracle on the order of loaves and fishes. Generally, on a diet, I can expect to lose, oh, half a pound a month. Also, just to get a little too personal for a moment,Continue reading “Day 3 of the Fast Metabolism Diet: I’m Basically a Supermodel Now”

It turns out that a lot of my friends have quit caffeine, and they were all willing to talk about the experience. However, after a few conversations, I started feeling less grateful and more terrified. Most of them said they basically felt like garbage for the first four days. If I felt like I didContinue reading “Day 2 of the Fast Metabolism Diet: Electric (Drip) Boogaloo”

Bear with me, because I’m not thinking very clearly. I have, for some reason that I now forget, given up caffeine, sugar, wheat, and dairy, at least for awhile. In theory, for 28 days. I’m starting off with a week, because I can’t absorb that kind of commitment all at once. Of course, right now,Continue reading “Day 1 of the Fast Metabolism Diet: I Have Clearly Lost My Mind”