Jennie Smash

By

Jen Hubley Luckwaldt

·

In the Old Days, This Required Binoculars

I was making my rounds of former flames on all my usual stalking sites the other day (MySpace, Facebook, Google, the National Registry of Sex Offenders) when I discovered that one of my exes has recently entered into a relationship. This ex is basically two exes, because I dated him twice, during two totally separate…

I was making my rounds of former flames on all my usual stalking sites the other day (MySpace, Facebook, Google, the National Registry of Sex Offenders) when I discovered that one of my exes has recently entered into a relationship. This ex is basically two exes, because I dated him twice, during two totally separate periods of my life.

Anyway, the point is that I am really a lovely person because I was so happy to see that he was in a relationship. Seriously, I rule.

Oh, and also, yes, I do think it’s normal to stalk exes on Facebook. Basically, if you date, sleep with, or even talk to me in a vaguely romantical fashion at any time in your life, I will stalk you on the internets until the end of time. You have been warned.

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Responses to “In the Old Days, This Required Binoculars”

  1. amberance

    I did just the opposite: I stalked the leasing agent that found me my apartment on the internet for a month and now he is my boyfriend. Stalking TOTALLY works.

    Reply
  2. Eric

    I misread this as saying that two of your exes were now dating each other, and I was impressed that you had been the genesis of gay. Then I saw that I was wrong.

    Reply
  3. jeff

    Your lucky, I can’t find any of my ex’s on facebook or myspace.

    Reply

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